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Got something to add? The following are international standards for men, for those who havent seen the email thats been flying around. Does anyone have anything to add .... 1. Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella. 2. It's okay for a man to mourn in the following circumstances: a. When a heroic dog dies to save its master. b. The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse. c. , After crashing his car chief. d. One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into The Crying Game. e. When she is using her teeth. 3. Any man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his companions. 4. Unless he murdered someone in your family, you rescue a friend from jail within 12 hours. 5. If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her. 6. Moaning about the brand of free beer in a bar Buddys is prohibited. However complain at will if the temperature is not adequate. 7. No man is obliged to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your birthday is strictly optional Buddys. 8. On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest. 9. When faced with other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you can never ask who's playing. 10. You can flatulate front of a woman only after you have brought to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment, she's officially your girlfriend. 11. It is permissible to drink a sip of alcohol fruity only when youre sunning on a tropical beach ... and delivered by a topless supermodel ... and is free. 12. Only in situations of moral and / or physical danger is allowed to kick another man in the nuts. 13. Unless youre in jail ever, the fight naked. 14. Friends do not let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed. 15. If a fly is down, that's your problem, have not seen anything. 16. Women who claim they like to watch sports should be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and have the ability to drink as much as other sports watchers. 17. A man in the company of a hot woman, suggestively dressed must remain sober enough to fight. 18. Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that's just greedy. 19. If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer. 20. Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a friend of his, unless she is withholding sex pending your response. 21. Phrases that can not be uttered to another man while lifting weights a. Yeah, baby, Push it! b. Cmon, give me one more! Stronger! c. Another set and we can hit the showers! 22. Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing ie both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other cases, an almost imperceptible gesture is all the conversation you need. 23. Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than they are capable of having sex with her. Keep a stopwatch by the phone. Hang up if necessary. 24. The morning after you and a girl who once was just a friend mono carnal drunken sex, the fact that youre feeling weird and guilty is no reason not to drive again before the discussion about what a big mistake occurs. 25. It is acceptable to drive your car. It is not acceptable for her to drive yours. 26. You can not buy a car with pinks, lime green, orange or sky blue. 27. The girl who answered the question What do you want for Christmas? If, you loved me, you'd know what I want! gets an Xbox. End of story. 28. There is no reason for guys to watch ice skating or gymnastics for men. Ever.
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